And you'll never know how good it feels...

Ok, I will sound narcissistic, but put it like that...I have a high opinion of myself. Everyone should. Lately I had some people in my life who were getting the best of me...Ouf, yeah, so out of 3, 1 is gone, Jill. That was just great and I told the others what bugged me about them! I think I never felt this good! So back to Jill, I wish I could say I cared a lot.

But I tell myself she never really appreciated me, took avantage of me, sure, but no real appreciation. This makes me value my real friends even more, but it also makes me suspicious of new people in my life. It's easy not to appreciate someone an take advantage of all the little goo things they bring into your life.

We had fun, shared laughter not really tears, mostly fun, but I realise I do not like what she brought into my life. Mostly, lets be honest, bad behaviour...it's cool for sometime but when you look back at it, you put it in the corner of your mind as youth mistakes! ;)

You'll never know how good it feels...yeah, that's for her but in my life, Jill's not the only one who's done me wrong. I LOVE my friends! I'd be there 'til the end and I'd do whatever I can for them. Well so long as I consider them real friends...I'm picky and anytime I've let my guards down, well,I've realised I shouldn't have. I can hold a grudge, won't let it destroy me but believe me, I can hold it forever.

I can also forgive but it will never be the same. Know the saying: "You're forgiven but not forgotten." That's what I live by. So anyone who does me wrong will never know how good it feels to have someone like me in their life. A friend that will be there and not give up on you unless you give up on me. 'Cause if you do, in a way, you're just not a friend at all. I bother for some people but not all. Some I just know I care and always will no matter what they do. Others, I just let go...they don't deserve my worrying.

As for those of you (my friends) if you don't know that I care you should know very soon and I've probably told you before. But I sure will once again and every once in a while so you always know, you are special to me. I definitly know how good it feels to have you in my life. ;)